How I stalked some dude with an exposed nipple and stumbled upon the Zenithian Sword

Adapted from the "How I stalked some dude with an exposed nipple and stumbled upon the Zenithian Swordwwww" thread started by an anonymous poster with the ID YDmPhSO2 on 2ch.

Caution: Read this after playing Dragon Quest V (or at least watching a playthrough on YouTube) for the full experience!****