I've Been Proposed to by a Villain

I witnessed a murder scene of a villain. To make matters worse, he caught me. I think I hear the sound of death beckoning. He approaches me, his hand in his coat. I wonder what he’s reaching for. A knife? A gun? I guess it doesn’t matter. There’s only one thing I can think of now.

“I’m going to die.”

I wasn’t expecting what he pulled out of his coat.

“Will you marry me?”

“What?”